48 Hours of THE WORST

Alright.

I was not really planning on blogging during this trip. I haven't updated the blog in a while anyway and I want to save the really good stories for when I get home.

But, holy crap, the first two days of this trip is the new Hottest of Messes, and I've got to tell you all about it.

The story is a two-parter and a bit long, so bear with me.

PART I - Our Unexpected Detour to Canada
And also my first time in Canada

I already knew our travel time to London was going to be long. We flew out of JFK and were scheduled to have a ten-hour layover in Iceland. Then we would fly to Heathrow Airport, making our total travel time around 19 hours.

Imagine, if you will, a perfectly calm flight with Icelandair. I didn't know this- but Icelandair gives you free TV and movies and they have a pretty good selection. Honestly: Argo, Shawshank Redemption, All the President's Men and Sherlock Holmes were all available for me to watch, pause, rewind, etc. Not to shabby, huh?

About an hour-and-a-half into the flight, I noticed the flight attendants crowding around a seat two rows in front of me. I thought someone was having a panic attack, until the passenger started throwing punches.

Immediately about ten guys (bros, really- God bless) jumped up and pinned the guy down. He was screaming and the girlfriend of the guy who got punched was crying and profanities were being yelled AND I WAS FREAKING OUT.

Meanwhile one of the flight attendants ran up with her arms full of zip ties. I couldn't see everything but based on what I was hearing they bound his wrists and ankles. Immediately the man began to scream that these people were killing him and why weren't we all coming to his rescue? They quieted him, but soon after he would try to attack someone again, and the men on the plane would hold him down and bind him with more zip ties. Then he would start screaming again.

For the next hour or so this cycle continued, culminating in the rows in front-of and behind him being cleared, two male passengers guarding him from the seats behind and him being bound to his chair.

The captain announced that we would be making an emergency landing in Goose Bay, Canada. Most passengers were speculating that he was really drunk, but to be honest I think it had to be drugs. Maybe it was the crazed way he was screaming - half in French, half in English - but I would bet it was something stronger than booze.

After we landed, I watched out my window as three police cars, two ambulances and one stair car (you're gonna get hop-ons) pulled up to the plane. The man didn't fight as the police escorted him off the plane and to the ambulance. After the crew was asked some questions by the police and our plane was refueled, we took off and completed our trip to Iceland. Overall, we lost about four hours.

And needless to say, there was no sleep on that flight. But they did give us free food and drinks, so...

Part II - Literally Every Hotel in London is Booked

After six hours hanging out and sleeping at the airport in Iceland (there really just wasn't enough time to go explore after the delay) we hopped on our transfer flight to Heathrow Airport.

We had a reservation that night for a room in the Hilton on-site at the airport, knowing that we would be exhausted after traveling that long. We arrived, only to be told the reservation was made for the night before and that they were booked for the night.

Not losing hope, we found a coffee shop in the terminal. We grabbed some sandwiches and began to look for a hotel, any hotel, where we could stay that night.

And we looked.

And we looked.

And then we looked some more.

And then I was straight up crying because I had only gotten like two hours of sleep in the preceding 24 hours and it was midnight and guess what we were going to have to just hang out in the airport until we could check into our hostel downtown at 2 p.m. AND I HATE EUROPE AND LET ME GO HOME.

And so it was. Paul and I both tried to catch some sleep while the other watched our things. I barely slept. At some point I resigned myself to the inevitable and started downing caffeine.

So now, on roughly three hours of sleep for two days, we caught the tube to our hostel, which I immediately began to panic would be bed bug infested and horrible.

Right now, I'm sitting in the pub below the hostel. The building and rooms are downright charming, it's close to everything and the wifi is free.

We just ordered a pizza and we have reservations for the Eye of London tomorrow. Everything is good, and I'm hoping we got all the bad luck out of the way for this trip.

Now if you would be so kind as to knock on any wood nearby.

Thank you.